Yes, it’s dark humor. No, it’s not serious. And yes… that’s the joke.

This “I Cook for People I Should Have Poisoned (So Yes, I Have Self-Control)” kitchen tea towel leans fully into over-the-top, cartoon-style sarcasm. Featuring a whimsical illustrated character and exaggerated wording, this design is meant purely as a tongue-in-cheek joke — the kind of humor that gets laughs from people who appreciate bold novelty décor.

The illustration style is playful and lighthearted, clearly signaling satire rather than realism. Designed to be both decorative and functional, this towel is absorbent, durable, and best enjoyed by kitchens with a strong sense of humor.

Perfect for:

• Fans of exaggerated, dark-ish humor (clearly joking)
• Novelty & gag gifts
• Kitchens with personality and sass
• Friends who appreciate sarcastic décor
• Conversation-starter displays (not subtle)

Because humor sometimes goes where manners don’t — and that’s okay when it’s clearly a joke.